BODYGUARDED

My friend Marilyn (formerly of E! and now of CNN) has introduced me to a fellow "E!er" (in that we were on the same show but different scenes), Elijah Shaw of Industry-Icon Executive Protection and Bodyguard Services.  I recently read through his website and watched some of his youtube.com interviews.

Watching him do his work brought back a very funny thing that happened on the West End when we were filming an episode of Jade's PA. We were filming the episode where Tara was finally getting to do her biggest challenge of getting Jade on the stage in a West End production.

No small feat.

On the night of the show, the directors were shooting me arriving at the theatre from a couple different angles.  I had on my Harry Potter cape (not really but feels very Hogwart-ish) and was supposed to walk out the theatre's front door, not look directly into the camera and walk away as if I was leaving the theatre.  Try not looking in a camera when it's the only place your not supposed to look!  Sort of like not looking at the elephant in the room type of thing.  And then if you look somewhere else that's not naturally in your line of vision it feels fake as all get out.

So we do the shot once and then the director requests it once again for good measure.  Since I don't have an ear piece on me, I am told to go in the theatre and count to three before I exit looking natural....ah, yeah. 

I count to three and push the theatre door open.

Suddenly I was enveloped in a crowd and the flashbulbs of paparazzi were going off in my eyes.

I thought that Jade must have arrived at the theatre as I was coming out.  The cameras kept rolling.

As I tried to look "natural" in a totally unnatural situation I was grabbed firmly by the shoulders and darn near lifted out of my shoes.  A bald-headed black man in sunglasses and sporting a decidedly American accent took his hands off my shoulders after literally moving me out of the way while saying, "Sorry ma'am but you can't go here."

My negritude wanted to scream, "What?????"  But the momentary  confusion of the camera rolling on me, the flash bulbs and pap's camera clicking away and then Adam Sandler appearing dead in front of me....I suddenly thought I was back in LA.  One of those temporary confusions that lasts a millisecond.  Adam, to me, equals home.  Hollywood.  San Joaquin Valley where they filmed part of "Click" which was premiering in the movie theatre a few paces away.  One of those confusions you don't speak about unless you wonder if folks are going to wonder if you'd imbibed during work hours.

When my director yelled "cut," he ribbed me and said, "Bet you thought the pap was for you, didn't you."  I'm not that delusional but it was weird to walk into that scene by accident and literally be picked up and moved.  I'm no featherweight so this was a task but Mr. Bodyguard was no small man.

I think I can now say that I have literally been swept off my feet...and almost out of my shoes.